All in by Jen Ryan Onken

by Jen Ryan Onken



Like stepping off a lip into the air—
snow and sky a ruptured sense of who

is where. All that white, even the barn
and house loosen like confusion into

the field. My father used to throw a ball
around with me as darkness fell. Hard to lose

the muscle-memory of catching and
letting go. I feel him settle in this ghosting

meadow like a print—a gap that sinks
when shadows drop into the snow.

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Jen Ryan Onken lives and teaches in southern Maine. Recent poems have appeared in Deep Water, Zocalo Public Square, The Night Heron Barks, and LEON Literary Review. Her chapbook, Medea at the Laundromat, was a 2020 finalist for the Larry Levis Post-Grad Prize at Warren Wilson's Program for Writers, where she recently completed her MFA. Jen was the Maine Poet's Society winner of their 2019 prize for previously unpublished poets.

by Jen Ryan Onken


for Nicole Chvatal


You on the telephone—I’m ready
to throw myself off a bridge. I’m losing it
.
The snowmelt stretches out from gray
to blue. I know this tender bridge with its white
limpets and cement. The way your toes
grip the edge so hard it hurts. The grassy bank
all bare despite the leftover snow. Bald eagles
and their awful noise. What could inoculate
against this? The tidy nest waiting in the eaves,
the vernal pools, the purple tulips swelling
underground. The dog sniffing out the breathing
moles. Sister, shall we sink by land or sea?
Nothing floats. We laugh because all our brothers do
is beat us up at Hearts. They ignore our parents.
They’re always fucking around on boats.

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Jen Ryan Onken lives and teaches in southern Maine. Recent poems have appeared on Maine Public Radio, The Night Heron Barks, and Love's Executive Order. She was the Maine Poet's Society winner of their 2019 prize for previously unpublished poets. Her micro chapbook, That First Toss, was a finalist for the 2019 Washburn Prize at Harbor Review. Jen recently completed her MFA from Warren Wilson's Program for Writers.