Fear of loss is a neural pathway full of trigger
warnings laid down to rest after a first loss,
then fires again & again
after each successive loss, then fires again
when no active loss is looming
except that now loss always looms
like bubbles in an otherwise smooth syringe
loss looms, large, even while watching
the ocean meet the sky as if, to allude the horizon
never ends, as if, to allude no one ever ends,
a first loss begets learning loss exists, learning loss
exists begets fearing it begets taking
vital measures to perceive control of
its timing begets sitting right in its eye
instead of being hurricaned with the cruel
load of having to lose with no warning
with no provision for the pain, for the grief
for the grief that grows, for the grief loss knows.
